fifth letter

Dear Jacob,

How time flies so fast! I had been oblivious of the days you have been with us, with me. It's about t year now since we met and you being so chivalrous did something no man has ever done for me. You rolled the stone. And now you're working and waiting for the day we'll be married and be together as man & wife.

I do not wish to count the days. It simply will not do. My heart slowly recognizes your presence and it just gives me a reason to smile all day. I wish the days of waiting will be over soon. But there are still six more years to go through. I do not mind the wait because i will be spending the rest of my life with you. What is seven years compared to a lifetime?

However, there are moments when i feel like i cannot wait anymore. Sometimes, my heart just aches for the thought of you and me together. My eyes fill with tears of joy as i remember your face. I know the work must be tiring but i also know you are not baffled by it. Hang on my dear Jacob. A few more years and your labor will reap its reward. You do not have any idea what this waiting is doing to me but i believe it has taught me patience more than anything else. I'm also learning to trust you and your God. It's funny how things would work this way but i have never been happier.

Take care always.


your rachel

fourth letter

Dear Jacob,

How are the sheep doing? I'm sure they're thriving under your care. You are looking more rugged every day. I believe the sun and the dessert is doing you good.

I had a talk with Leah today. She seemed happy about the arrangement. But i can't help but notice the sadness in her eyes. I guess it must be hard on her knowing that I'm pledged to be married and not her. I begin to question whether marriage is the only thing for women to wait about. What if nobody speaks for her? What if nobody spoke for me? I guess life must be unfair at times. But I don't know how to comfort her. We're supposed to just wait till these things are ironed out. Only our fathers and brothers have the authority to give us into marriage. We cannot even choose the man we want. I feel for Leah's heart. I know she wants to marry there really is nothing before us if we don't.

How i wish i could ease her pain and uncertainty. How i wish i could tell her it's alright when i don't really know if it will be.

For now, i simply hope and pray that she also be given a man who will love her and bear her children so she won't be that lonely anymore.

And yes, seven years is worth the wait Jacob. And I am waiting.




your rachel

...third letter...

Dear Jacob,

Seven years? Are you out of your mind? That is too much of a worth for a woman like me... i don't deserve that... and you really have to promise father that? ... do you know how shrewd father is? He would not take seven years for me... i'm sure he's up to something... i'm already afraid for the outcome.

Watching you attend to the flock day after day after day just warms my heart beyond description... How was it possible - that a woman like me would deserve the attention and the sacrifice of a man like you? I have never felt that valued before... i have always lived second to Leah... and my life seemed to revolve on just being second, being younger... but you, coming to father like that? ... telling him you chose me over Leah... that's the first time i was ever taken first. Not that i mind, really, but it's a tough life... to live as second, as the younger one - bullied by my older siblings.

Shall i say that you're the answer to my prayers? That in the past years i have been uttering these prayers to the gods of my father but they never answered. And now, there you are... before me... every day, here in my father's house waiting, working to be with me... there really must be a God who listens... somewhere... i would love to know Him...

Seven years will be a long wait... but you seem tireless and unmindful of the time... a strange man you are! Yet my heart warms every time i see you smile back... could it be possible? i think it is possible... i might have begun loving you...



gazing from afar.

rachel

second letter

Dear Jacob,

i can't believe my ears... you chose me over Leah? and she's the older one... i wonder why father never disagreed... you're asking my hand in marriage? are you out of your mind? we just met... well, i believe a few days ago... i feel happy already - imagining my life with you for the rest of my days...

sometimes, i watch you as you bring the sheep home... and wonder.. what did i ever do to deserve such a man like you? maybe the Lord your God who has brought you here wants me to know Him, too...

i will try to pray to Him to keep you safe and watch over you... i know He will... He brought you here safe and sound and whole... and so i know that as you go to shepherd the flock every day, He will be with you...

thank you for the wild flowers you gave yesterday... that made me smile and i went to bed happy... the small talk was all i needed to be sure that what i heard was true... thank you...


waiting...

rachel